Friday, February 25, 2011

That "L" Word

I'm going to get to day 3, but first, this short announcement:

I HATE BEING SICK!!! I know, nobody LIKES to be sick, but I really HATE it! It just makes me mad. I feel like there is so much more I could be doing. Blah! Hopefully this antibiotic will help soon. Shout out to my most wonderfullest sister ever for taking me to the doctor. :)

Ok, here we go:

Day 3: My First Love

Alright, so I've been staring at the screen for 20 minutes trying to decide what to write. Do I want to be serious? Or do I want to make light of that "L" word? I mean, I could talk about my love of chocolate:

I mean, seriously, who didn't see that one coming?

I could talk about loving my mom and dad. I mean, honestly, they're probably the first people in my life that I loved.

Do I want to share my love of cheerleading? Yep, that's right folks, I was a cheerleader! In fact, I LOVED it! It was so much fun. :)

Or do I want to say my first love was God? That's true, He was.

You all know I love my son more than life itself. That's love, true love. :) But is he my "first love"???

As I type all of this, I realize I'm hiding from (what I believe to be) the true meaning of this post. I told myself I was going to be 100% honest in this blog, and I plan to stick to that!

I have been blessed to truly be in love twice in my life. My first love was such a large part of my high school and first college year that I feel like I need/want to tell you about him. :) I think most of you know his name, but I'm going to call him "Joe" just for kicks. :)

Joe and I were together pretty much all through high-school. We had one of those on-again, off-again relationships that drove everybody in our lives CRAZY! Haha. We also shared a year in college together. I will admit it, I was in love. I'm not going to say "Looking back, I realize it wasn't real love", because I truly believe it was. I like to think we learned a lot from each other about what we wanted in future relationships and out of life in general. He was and is an amazing person. He just wasn't the person for me. He is in a long-term realationship with a wonderful woman whom I just love to pieces. It makes me so happy to see them happy. I believe that's what love is, wanting to see people happy no matter what that means for you.

And what does it mean for me that he is happy with somebody else? It means I was able to find my one TRUE "meant for me" love of my life! By the time I met Jeffrey, I knew what (and who) I was looking for in a marriage partner. I still remember telling my mom several months into our friendship, "I'm going to marry this man. I'm just not ready to admit that to him yet". :) I knew. I just knew. Jeffrey will tell you he knew, too. I had always heard that, "You'll just know", but I thought I "knew" with Joe. Then I met Jeffrey, and I realized what all those people meant. He is my soul-mate.

I truly believe God put him on this earth for me, and as long as I'm alive, he will be my first true and first forever love.

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